Things that go bang in the night

We have two very different views on thunderstorms. I’ll let Sir speak first.

I love them, the pure elemental power as a streak of light shoots across the sky, the loud crack that follows fading out with a deep rumble. I’m mesmerised whenever I witness them, their effect tends to bring out something primal in me… which basically means I get hornier than a brass band. I then spend the short period that the storm tends to last searching for whichever hole my Bee has hidden in. My only real issue though is 9 times out of 10 I’m usually asleep when they happen and they never manage to wake me up.

How he manages to sleep through them I will never know but then he could sleep through a brass band rehearsing in the bedroom!

I hate them, I have an irrational fear of thunderstorms. I don’t know what it is about them that scares me but then that’s what happens with an irrational fear. I know they look stunning and if I could bear to peek I would probably mesmerised too.

If I am in company I can hold it together and act normally, if I’m at home you will find me buried under the bed covers with pillows over my head until I need to come up for air and check to see if it’s over yet.

I have at times reminded him that if he’s awake and I’m hiding under the covers there is a perfect opportunity for my mouth to be well used, there is no need for the storm to be the only thing that goes bang in the night. But he tells me he doesn’t trust what my teeth may do when I jump and yelp. I reluctantly agree with his judgement, if there is a storm about we could probably do without a storm in the bedroom too.