Do I have a praise kink? Well, let’s find out what praise kink is all about first and then we can see if it works for me or not.
Praise kink is essentially where the dominant partner showers their submissive partner with compliments, affirmations. Simply praising them lots. It’s not simply using affirmations during play, it’s making the praise the focus of play.
So, is it for me?
Well, I have discovered that I need affirmations from partners, it is my key love language. When I don’t see or hear those affirmations, I withdraw into myself, my brain goes to darker places and I shut down.
But, receiving it as the sole focus of play is just awkward for me. Yes I’m into humiliation play, however, because affirmations are key for me and my well-being, I need to know they are sincere when I hear them and not used as a way of making me feel uncomfortable.
If I’m being honest, it feels like it belongs to someone who likes being treated like a Princess, being the centre of someone’s world and them doing everything they can to make them feel special. And that is probably where my submission is different to those that enjoy it. If someone is putting me up on a pedestal and showering me with praise, it doesn’t make me feel submissive, it makes me feel as if I’m the higher partner in that power exchange. Whereas I need to be ‘made’ (within my limits) to submit and treated as the lower partner in the scene. Outside that scene, of course I need to be treated equally, I’m a submissive not a doormat.
I have to celebrate you, baby I have to praise you like I should Praise you ~ Fatboy Slim
That’s not to say after a scene I don’t want to be hugged and told I’ve been a good Bee or a good boy as part of my immediate aftercare, or when I’ve done something particularly difficult. I just don’t want it to be the focus, there are far more fun things to be doing after all!
Modesty Ablaze
I love that photo … I often scribble notes on my subs during a session and though I never use a permanent marker, I do expect them to always wear my affirmations home with them. (Where they may of course scrub them off)
But yes mere praise is never the focus … it is a means to the end!!!
Xxx – K
HappyComeLucky
My beautiful, wonderful, hot and filthy Bee. I’ll affirm you like I should.
JerBear
Beautiful image. Well done!
And I read all of your words, I don’t always understand – but they’re interesting.
Molly
I had the same song going through my head when I wrote my post… also hence the title of my post. I think there are so many ways to enjoy this kink and it is interesting reading how it varies for people
Molly