It’s a bit of an open secret that The Keeper and I met on a swingers website, although that’s not the story we tell most people! We were both single at the time, or at least coming out of long term relationships.
After spending the first year or so enjoying each other I broached the subject of us playing with others, we were both on a swingers site to explore after all. Not long after that conversation and working out our rules we set ourselves up a couples profile on another swingers website.
We started off by just chatting in chat rooms online, building relationships with people and ended up going to a club, where we actually became regulars. It was lots of fun but actually we found it really difficult to play with others. Not only were we incredibly shy, finding it difficult to approach people, there was also a distinct age difference with us in our early 30s being far younger than most.
One thing that put me right off playing at swinging clubs was the men who though they were entitled to approach any play, watching is one thing but I do not appreciate someone wanking against me uninvited! Not only that but I found the supposedly bi women were usually very drunk and pushed into doing what their husbands wanted. Non of this made me feel comfortable so we often walked away.
We also tried to meet couples away from clubs. Some were more successful than others. We have long term friends we’ve played with, we’re even Facebook friends and would attend family parties too. I’m fairly sure their parents knew exactly what our relationship was! Sadly our lives went in different directions and we’ve lost touch now.
Then there was the endless stream of drinks with people we clearly didn’t click with, or those that were looking for something we didn’t want despite our profiles clearly stating what we were and what we wanted. One thing we stumbled across time and time again was bisexual men claiming they were straight and expecting we were doing the same. Sadly, for me, the Bee Keeper is indeed straight but I find it even sadder that bisexual men had to hide their identity because of the stigma attached to it. Whereas women being bisexual is almost expected.
We did have some amazing nights out and met lots of lovely people but rejection after rejection took its toll. We clearly aren’t attractive enough for the swinging world and to be quite honest the entitlement of the men we came across almost put me off men for life! That, coupled with the double standards meant we left the world of swinging behind.
That isn’t to say we don’t want to include others in our play or relationship. However we would prefer meetings to be less forced and more organic.
slave sindee
ah yes great photo
tis a shame when boundaries are set and not kept.
also a shame that there is a stigma about being a bi male yet bi females are hot.
You 2 are lovely and attractive don’t think anything else
Molly
Definitely found the whole bi-male thing to be a problem. My partner at the time was straight but comfortable sharing with other blokes but quite often we found that men would try and cross that boundary even though it had been clearly stated
Molly
Kayla Lords
I love the picture! Swinging has never appealed to me and some of the bad behavior I’ve heard about (like drunk wives being pressured to play) makes it even less appealing.
DeviantSuccubus
It is quite interesting how your story describes the swinging events exactly how I’d imagine them for myself: people who are older than me, and the uncomfortable feeling of men being too close by. I am sorry to hear that you haven’t been able to find any others to click with yet. But maybe the future will bring some fun and interesting people your way!
Also, that is a fantastic picture!
Ina Morata
What a Pic! 🙂
It’s such a shame that you were left feeling so uncomfortable, but, for me, I think you did the right thing, walking away. I hope you have more success elsewhere. 🙂
Modesty Ablaze
Such a brilliant photo . . . just LOVE it !!!
Sad to hear that you were subjected to such unwelcome attention from some of the men . . . that isn’t right, and shouldn’t have happened.
Oh, and I must disagree with your “We clearly aren’t attractive enough for the swinging world” . . . you are both so lovely !!!
Xxx – K
Jupiter Grant
I’m sorry the clubs weren’t as fun as you’d hoped. I absolutely love your swinging photo!!!
Victoria Blisse
I love the photo here, but your experience with swinging sounds more not fun than fun. Yeah, entitled men are a problem in the BDSM scene too, I find. I am better at giving a swift fuck off to them, though.
NPE
Sad that even in a specialized group there is little chemistry.
E.L. Byrne
I am sorry the swinging experiences didn’t work out. I haven’ really explored that world much and that all sounds like it can be pretty darn uncomfortable.